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Home Feature

Do You Want to Have a Threesome or Are You Just Codependent?

Take Our Quiz and Find out if You're Really Down for a Ménage à Trois!

Lauren Davis by Lauren Davis
November 10, 2021
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Do You Want to Have a Threesome or Are You Just Codependent?
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Down for a three-way? Threesomes can be a fun experience and a great story for all involved- no wonder you’re thinking “Yes please!” But maybe they’re not for you if you’re actually thinking, “Yes! More people to please!” Take this funny quiz to know whether your experience will end up a holy trinity or a toxic triangle.

You are out for a night on the town with a friend and an attractive stranger starts flirting with both of you. You think to yourself-

a) They’re both super hot. Let’s get this threesome started!
b) Interesting development. Let’s have another drink and see where the night takes us 😉
c) This will work out great! I haven’t had sex in so long that I would love to have a friend in there for emotional support.
d) How do I get out of this? I wonder how hard it would be to fake my own death.

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If you could have any of the Sex and the City ladies join you and your partner in a threesome, who would it be?

a) Samantha- I’m looking for a wild night of fun with a real sexpert (and she’s the only one who’s ever performed cunnilingus)
b) Carrie- body be bangin’!
c) Miranda- I’ve wanted to be friends with her IRL ever since I watched the show and this seems like as good a start as any
d) Charlotte- I don’t actually want to have a threesome and I know she’d freak out and leave before we made it to the bedroom.

What’s the most exciting part of a ménage à trois! for you?

a) Two times the mouths!
b) Two times the dicks!
c) Two times the attention that temporarily fills the ever-expanding void inside me created by my childhood wounding!
d) Two times the expectation to perform! Ahhhhh!!!

Yeah, sex is great, but have you ever tried…

a) More sex?
b) Making love?
c) Therapy 3 times a week?
d) Literally anything else?

Favorite onscreen sex scene?

a) The threesome in “Wild Things”
b) The threesome in “Y Tu Mama Tambien”
c) Cersei and Jamie Lannister in “Game of Thrones”
d) Whichever one is the shortest

You’re in the bedroom and it’s threesome time! Where do you start?

a) I immediately start getting naked.
b) I take it slow- we all take turns kissing.
c) I adjust the air conditioner because I’m worried about my partners getting too hot mid-coitus, but then it gets a little too cold so I have to turn it up a couple of degrees. This goes on for about 20 minutes.
d) I burst into tears and apologize preemptively.

You told your partner that you would have a threesome with them for your next anniversary- and now it’s next week. You are anticipating a…

a) Wild feast of carnal delights.
b) Fun experiment!
c) Chore to make my partner happy. Instead of cleaning out the rain gutters, I’ll just be polishing some dude’s knob.
d) Big fight, because you’re going to gaslight them into thinking they misheard you and you actually promised a “free plum”.

How’d You Do?

Mostly A’s: Go download the 3rder app immediately! You are truly super horny for a three-way sex adventure!

Mostly B’s: If the opportunity presents itself, go for it! You seem to have a healthy attitude towards sex and are down to explore and try new things!

Mostly C’s: Ask again after a few years of working on yourself! Probably best to spend some time figuring out your own wants and needs before trying to satisfy two horny people.

Mostly D’s: You do NOT want to have a threesome. You maybe don’t even really want to have a twosome.

Tags: FMFMfmthreesomesthreeway
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Lauren Davis

Lauren Davis

Lauren Davis is a freelance writer for the Emjoy and Oh Cleo apps. She has written for brands such as American Greetings, PooPourri, Raid, Brooklyn Toy Museum, and many others, and her humor writing has been published in Widget Mag, 251.net, Points in Case, and The Belladonna. Lauren is also a stand-up comic who has appeared on Fox, Hulu, and Viceland. Check out her website TheLaurenDavis.com

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